Posts Tagged ‘joke’

Hobbit Perfume Advert

May 6, 2015

Just a quick one because I don’t think this video needs much explanation. It requires a little though so I’ll write the article Buzzfeed style because I know you’re all busy ‘on the go’ types that don’t have time to read proper sentences.

1) So

 

2) I made this video as a parody

3) like, a joke, a piss take

4) of the Charlize Theron Dior adverts. Infact that’s where I got the audio from.

5) If you’ve seen The Hobbit: Battle of The Five Armies you’ll know what I’m talking about.

6) (insert appropriate gif here)

7) Just watch the video, I can’t even…

.

Josh

What Women Want

December 25, 2012

I don’t believe people really think about the practicalities of the things they off handedly request for Chirstmas. Having said that I don’t think people really want the things they say they do.

At about 2.40am yesterday morning I had the urge to animate a little.

16 hours later and I finished, only taking short breaks for eating and to use the toilet. More impressive (to me anyway) is the fact that I hadn’t slept since the previous day.

Despite the fact that there is still some colouring that I would have liked to have done, I don’t think it’s too much of a problem in the grand scheme of things. The main thing is that the joke comes across.

First thing I did was make a background. I then animated stick men straight ahead using the pencil tool, this was the quickest part of the process. I then went over this with the brush tool very loosely and coloured santa red.

Interestingly (to those that are interested) I recorded the audio about 14hrs in then spent 5 minutes on rough mouth movements which do the job well enough. I then spent an hour on sound and an hour putting it all together.

Wierd way of doing things.

Although I would not reccomend this method of working I find it amazing what a person can achieve when they’re on a roll. However as a result of going to sleep after awake being awake for 35hours my eye sockets hurt and part of my brain still isn’t responding yet insists on hitting itself against the inside of my skull.

Josh

Jim Henson’s Labyrinth Remake Poster By Yours Truly

June 27, 2012

CGHub has regular contests, from reimagining Star Wars to who can draw the best unicorn.

One of the most recent challenges that piqued my interest was to redesign the poster for Jim Henson’s Labyrinth, starring David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly as it’s one of my favourite films as a kid and now as an Adult (debatable).

I’m not one for competitions so was hesitant if not unwilling to participate.

Then it came to me, what does Labyrinth mean to me when I think about it?

What started as a joke became my entry, then I actually had a look at the brief and figured if it was a remake, it made perfect sense for it to be a Russ Meyer film so here you go (I have no idea why):

The final entries can be seen here.

Josh

Top Ten Ginger Deaths in Film

January 9, 2011

Here it is folks!

The Top 10 Ginger Deaths in film:

Drum roll please…

10Watchmen

I didn’t like what I saw of the film and I like this scene even less. The explosion is not quick or violent enough and it completely cheapens the impact of Rorschach’s death. However i’m sure there are some of you that liked it, so this is for you.

Enjoy

(p.s. If you haven’t, read the comic if it’s the only one you ever read)

9Dune

I understand Kyle Machlachanahnan must’ve been under a lot of pressure when David Lynch asked him to have a duel to the death with Sting on the set of Dune. Not only was sting already an established actor due to his exceptional role in Quadrophenia but he was also highly proficient with a blade due to his time as a knife fighter. During matches he would regularly discard the blade and proceed bite his opponents, thus earning the name ‘the sting’ (later shortened) as his behaviour was often fast, unexpected and injuries stung afterward.

Anyway, Kyle Machlachanannannn fights Sting, he gets the upper hand and kills sting in the head with a knife, he then shouts so loudly he makes the ground break.

Class.

8 Ken Park

It’s a nice summer day, this Kid called Ken goes skate boarding. On his journey to the skate park he does some tricks and by the time he gets there is frustrated because his ‘skilzz’ are ‘whack’ so blows his brains out in front everyone.

This is why something called practice was invented.

7Goldeneye

Fat, balding, ginger admiral…DEATH BY SEX!

(even better because it’s in Hindi)

6 Last Action Hero

Charles Dance shoots Arnie and is about to finish him off with a knife…

But Arnie attacks him with words:

‘No sequel for you!’

Arnie then shoots Charles Dance in the eye who then explodes…twice.

5Perfume

Jean-Baptiste Grenouille likes to smell red heads. Hey, i’m not judging…whatever tickles your pickle. Thing is he goes a bit further and kills them. In this scene he follows a girl, sniffs and then strangles her.

Later on in the film he goes further still and shaves a dead chick’s head, keeping the hair and turning it into a perfume. That gets him into some touble so maybe taking the hair was a step too far.

(I couldn’t find the exact scene online, so this’ll have to do)

Next time a guy tells you he thinks you smell so good he wants to make a perfume out of you, just be careful because he might really be saying ‘I want to kill you and shave your head.’

4Goldfinger

Another James Bond one, this time Auric Goldfinger is sucked out of a plane arse first.

I’m noticing a theme with fat balding red heads in James Bond…

3Starship Troopers

Everything is going well…as well as any retreat from giant alien bugs that spray fire from their faces.

Dizzy (a hot chick with a gun) kills a bug and is pretty happy because it’s worth at least 1000xp meaning she’ll level up really soon and will be able to upgrade her dexterity because lately she’s noticed that her combat reflexes were not as good as they should be.

Anyway she’s waving to Rico who’s pretty impressed and just as she’s about to get on the ship…

BAM!

Impaled by a giant insect spider thing and stabbed like 50 times!

Everyone’s a bit sad, not that sad, but a bit upset. She tries hitting on Rico with blood coming out of her mouth and all these new holes she’s gained. Rico doesn’t find it sexy because she’s pretty much dead, and then she dies.

Yeah well that’ll teach you to put points into charisma, all the good it did you.

2 Dune (again)

This is probably the most brutal one out of the lot. Fat, puss ridden, homosexual Baron Harkonen is having his face poked at by some subserviant mad pervert ‘doctor’. Some slave kid comes in and the Baron is on it already.

He levitates up to this young ginger boy with what can only be described as a curious-and-excited look-of-a-determined-sex-face and then proceeds to bleed the boy to death.

Why?

Because he can.

1Once Upon a Time in the West

This number one for good reason.

It is perfect.

It’s the first impression you get of Henry Fonda’s character (Henry Fonda was famous for playing good guys so this was quite a change). His gang shoot up the innocent McBain family murdering three of them except the youngest, who then comes out to find his family dead.

He stands there in shock as five men in dusters approach him.They stand there looking at him. Henry Fonda sort of smiles and looks like the doesn’t really want to kill the kid, but you’re unsure if he is because of the look in his eyes. Then after the goon speaks you know he is.

Goon:’what do we do now frank?’

Fonda:’well now that you’ve called me by name…’

BAM!

Dead ginger kid.

Brilliant, Beautiful. Ruthless.

Josh